REACH-OUT
Vol.1 no.5                                                                                     April, 1999


PS. Sorry for the error in the Newsletter. I printed it at school and it seemed Ok so I printed from Windsor to the CSS printer in the Services Educatifs. I didn't see the underlining until the next day after the secretary had printed and sent out the copies. Oh those stupid computers!!!!


Time flies! Too late to wish you a happy Easter! Sorry. I had found some Easter goodies to include but never found time to put everything together and send it off. The seasonal activities are included anyway, for future use. The links I used were taken from links Caroline Boissel (Tournesol) passed on and I published on Cybersite, in the holidays center. Christmas, Valentines, St. Patrick’s Day and Easter links are available so far.

I have been working on Cybersite especially in time for a presentation at L’AQUOPS. You can now find different ‘student centers’ for research, language skills and projects and activities. Each center is organised to provide as many tools as possible to facilitate their Internet learning experience and organise ‘some’ of the chaos and limitless resources. There is also a teacher resource center where you can link to a variety of resources and information for lessons, handouts, activities, and so on.

L’AQUOPS, L’Association québécoise des utilisateurs de l’ordinateur au primaire et au secondaire held their annual convention at the end of March. Hugues Emond, Ste-Marguerite with the project l’école virtuelle and Jean Janelle, (St-Phillipe and St-Patrice) les TIC au primaire were definite hits with over 150 participants per presentation. My ESL presentation with James Rainville drew 30+ the last afternoon. Several others from des Sommets were there checking out the workshops and presentations.

The ESL circuit at L’AQUOPS offerred an introduction to WebQuests which really has potential for integrating les TIC , cooperative and project-based learning in a cross-corricular environment. Check them out.

Another presentation took us to e-pals where classes using 99 languages from 97 countries can correspond through e-mail and chat. Also we experimented NetMeeting that you can find on Windows 98 computers and download or update under Windows 95. With our integrated headphones and microphone, we could speak with others on the computers in the room or around the world. Very neat! Now to see how to use it with a class so they don’t use the anonymity to practice their ‘colourful vocabulary’ !#!‘ as can happen in chat activities.

Other workshops included a primary teacher from Montreal, who works with his ESL classes in a Apple-sponsored school. Check out his Internet activity:

Draw my monster!

http://www.csdm.qc.ca/st_gregoire/proj.monster.dessins.html

He received a $300 grant for creating this interactive Internet activity from Rescol - the Canadian school network, that he used to buy cdroms for his class. You can get more information on the Rescol program from their site or from L’AQUOPS

http://www.aquops.qc.ca

For the adult ESL teacher and others too, Sylvie Theriault highlighted her site which has grammar rallies, exercises and activities.

ESL students who are studying at an ADULT CENTER.

http://www.angelfire.com/pq/pages/

Station05, the new educational server for our region was unveiled at this year‘s AQUOPS. Many of the projects, sites and professional associations that were previously found at Cyberscol are now part of Station05, including Cybersite, CyberFiction and SPEAQ. The move is not complete but check-out Station05.qc.ca and adjust your "signets". This is a joint effort of the 4 school boards in our region including the Eastern Townships and should open the way to space for a site for your school and the opportunity of highlighting your Internet projects. We are already talking about setting up ESL-FSL online activities and projects. Image using NetMeeting to converse with another class in the region! Get the grey grooving! Make a suggestion.

L’AQUOPS, offers everything for anyone interested in les TIC from the curious to the ‘techie’. Keep it in mind. It will be in Québec City next year.

Exams are coming…

On the 19th of April you are invited to a, I hope, quick and easy initiation to BIM at Le Tournesol. While using the BIM program we choose from a list of available exams and scripts, however, by using your word processor and the appropriate copy of BIM you can directly acces the bank and print out the exams. Those more familiar with their word processor can then cut and paste the exam to their own preferences.

At the same time as I alternate between the primary and secondary groups, I’d like you to discuss questions, give feedback and make suggestions on different issues pertaining to your level(s). I’ll join you for the last part of each meeting. See you then!

 

CP News………………………………1

Guide ………………………………2

Meetings ……………………………3

Links

Biography.Com *

Penpal Box *

Weather Forecasts *

Cloze Maker *

Multiprogrammes *

Freeware Suggestions: Crosswords.....Etc *

Thecase.Com *

Movies On The World Wide Web *

Topic Ideas For Teachers *

The Biography Maker *

Writing Argumentative Essays *

Cnn Learning Resources *

The Grammar Gorillas *

Mind’s Eye Monster Exchange *

Using Presentation Software To Enhance Language Learning *

Jokes For The Classroom *

Games And Activities *

Word Grab With Songs *

Level: Any Level *

Rate The Apparatus *

How Do You Kill Time? *

Tell Me About Myself *

People Who ... *

Level: Any Level *

People Who ... *

Fly Swat! *

Web News Articles (Sec 5) *

The Holiday Zone *

The Egg Hunt *

Mystery Egg *

Scrambled Eggs *

The Bunny Pokey *

Why Do We Give Easter Eggs? *

Choosing Textbooks *

Ye Olde English Sayings *

The Clink *

Black Market *

Son Of A Gun *

Patent Leather *

Done To A Turn *

Beat Around The Bush *

Cut Through The Red Tape *

Minding Your Ps & Qs *

In The City *

Treasure Hunt *

Let’s Go To The Supermarket! *

Taxi Driver *

Doctor, Doctor! *

Twins *

Letter Scrapbook *

Do What They Say *

Cars *

Counting *

Playing Store *

What’s This? *

Same Or Different *

Rhyme Time *

The Efl Playhouse *

Crafts *

Chants *

Tongue Twisters : *

Caught *

More Jokes *

APRIL 19, 1999

École du Tournesol

8h 50 - 11h 30

SPRINGBOARDS ‘99
Annual Language Arts Conference
 
Renewing the Story
Friday, April 30, 1999
Holiday Inn
420 Sherbrooke Street W.
Montreal
$75.00
(514) 256-8367
8:00 - 16:15

 Biography.com

http://www.biography.com/index.html

Over 20,000 personalities

Objectif Terminal 1 Compréhension de l’oral

1.3 : Exposés biographiques

PenPal Box http://www.ks-connection.com/penpal/penpal.html

Objectif Terminal 7 : DÉMONTRER sa compréhension des textes suivants qu’il lit avec l’intention de s’informer sur des intérêts, des attitudes et des sentiments exprimés par d’autres.

 

Weather Forecasts

Objectif Terminal 1 :DÉMONTRER sa compréhension des textes suivants qu’il écoute avec l’intention de s’informer sur des faits relatifs à une personne, à une activité, à une chose, à un lieu.

    1. : Bulletins de météo (C2) 1re et 2e
Avec RealAudio

http://www.wral-tv.com/weather/forecasts.html#regionalaudio

 

Cloze Maker A free program for creating and completing on-screen Cloze exercises

http://www.net-shopper.co.uk/creative/education/languages/martin/cloze.htm

"Cloze" exercises require the student to study a piece of text with some words omitted, and insert words in the gaps so that the text makes sense. The ClozeMaker program allows language teachers to design and construct Cloze exercises for use in a classroom or open learning environment. The program features separate Teacher and Student areas, with access to the Teacher area controlled by a password.

Multiprogrammes

Un site conçu pour les enseignants de classes

multiprogrammes: http://rtsq.grics.qc.ca/multip

Transcripts:

Read this transcript from a popular movie:

Do you recognize the movie? What could it be about?

{Screen fades in to an eerie fog, gray clouds swirling across. Haunting music. We see "Warner Bros. Presents". The clouds

swirl faster. Faster. Faster. Suddenly the word "Twister" stumbles into the clouds then are picked up and blown away. Only the

impression of the word remains. Then the movie starts. Camera on an oil drill. At bottom of screen: June 1969. Camera on an

iron bridge in front of a sunset. A thunderstorm rolls in across the prairie, in the foreground, a fence. We see lighting. Then

camera on YOUNG JO’S house. Then inside. Jo’s FATHER, is watching the black and white TV, the bottom of the screen

flashing: "Tornado Warning". We hear the weather announcer: "….by radar now. There it is. The center of the circle over

Kingfisher county, moving northeastward….a little bit earlier….tornado warning continues now, it’s been extended

officially…."Camera on the young Jo sleeping. Lighting wakes her up, she clutches a doll. Her dog, Toby, is at the foot of the

bed. Her MOTHER comes in.}

Mother: Jo? Common’.

Jo: What is it, Mommy?

Mother: Common’ sweetie, let’s get up. Common’. It’s okay. {She lifts Jo out of bed and down stairs. Toby is left on the

bed.}It’s okay.

{Dialogue tight together.}

Father: We need to get down to the storm cellar right now.

Mother: Okay.

Jo: Toby?

Father: Common’, take Jo, let’s go!

Jo: Toby! Mother: Okay, Common’ sweetie.

Jo: Mommy?

Father: Common’, Honey, hurry!

Mother: Don’t be scared, Jo. Mama’s gotcha, Mama’s gotcha.

Father: TV. says it’s big. Might be an F5.

Mother: Okay, we’re going to the storm cellar.

Jo: Toby? Toby! TOBY!!!! {Toby barks, Jo keeps screaming "Toby"}

{They run out of the house, things exploding and falling all around them.}

Father: Hurry, we’ve got to move! Hand her to me!! Common’, let’s move!!

{The mother gives Jo to the father, they keep running. They get to the storm cellar, a door in the ground. Camera on Toby. He runs downstairs and out of the house. We hear on the TV the weather man ".....if you don’t have a cellar or a basement, go to the center part of your house......" Camera on the three outside. }

Mother: {Watching things explode}AHHH! We’re almost there, we’re almost there!

Father: Take her, take her! I gotta get the door! Hurry! Let’s go! {Father pries open the storm cellar door. They yell at each other to get inside. They do. The father slams the door and closes the latch.}

Jo: Daddy, daddy, Toby’s still outside!

Father: Common’ Toby, common’ boy! {He opens door again, Toby jumps inside. He closes latch again.}

Jo: It’s okay, Toby.

{Mother lights a kerosene lamp. Suddenly, the door begins shaking.}

Jo: Daddy!

Father: Grab Jo, honey! {The father goes over to door, pulling the handle toward him keeping the door closed.}Take Jo!

{She does so. It becomes harder and harder for him to keep the door shut. Harder. The strain becomes terrifyingly obvious.}

Father: I can’t hold it!!!!! DEAR GOD!!!!!

{He tries harder. The strain is becoming painful.}

Father: OH, GOD!!!!!!I CAN’T HOLD IT DOWN!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

{Suddenly, the door flies off, pulling the father with it. Screaming, he disappears into the twister. Jo and her mother are screaming in horror. Jo runs forward to the doorway flailing her arms at the now open doorway.}

Jo: DADDY!!!!!!! MY DADDYYYYY!!!!!

{Her mother pulls her back. Soon the screams fade away, as the camera fades into early morning. The devastation is sobering.

The silence ominous.

The answer is TWISTER but …

Read on at

http://www.geocities.com/Hollywood/Set/1243/script.htm

 

 

Have students mime out the action.

Want more??????

Visit: http://www.script-o-rama.com/trans.shtml

Freeware suggestions: Crosswords.....etc

WordJunction (VERSION 1.00)

Copyright © 1995 Ziff Davis Publishing Company

----------------------------------------------------------

First Published in PC Magazine Dec 5, 1995 (Utilities)

----------------------------------------------------------

WordJunction by Jonathan Waldman and Jack R. Heath

PURPOSE

WordJunction creates crossword and word find puzzles. It can be used to prepare vocabulary study aids for students, or to create

custom puzzles for special events or greeting cards.

http://www.zdnet.com/pcmag/pctech/content/14/20/ut1420.001.html

Other Freeware suggestions for teachers or class activities:

Create and Solve Word-Ladder Puzzles

PC Ladder creates word games that challenge your vocabulary and ingenuity.

By Neil J. Rubenking

Can you change WHITE to BLACK or HATE to LOVE? PC Ladder can! This issue’s utility lets you create, solve, and print "word ladder" puzzles. To solve such a puzzle, you transform a starting word into an ending word (usually an

opposite) by changing one letter at a time,

using a real word at every step. For example,

a FOOL can become WISE: FOOL, POOL,

POLL, PILL, WILL, WILE, WISE. Use PC

Ladder to create word-ladder puzzles, then solve them on the computer or print paper versions to share with friends and colleagues. The mathematician Charles Lutwidge Dodgson (better known as Lewis Carroll) is credited with inventing this delightful word puzzle.

http://www.zdnet.com/pcmag/pctech/content/17/08/ut1708.001.html

Also VOCAB 1.07 that will list all the vocabulary words in a text

ftp://ftp.latrobe.edu.au/pub/CELIA/english/win/vocabulary/VOCAB107.ZIP

Vocabulary Builder 1.07 (VOCAB107.ZIP 14598 11-02-93)

This program will take a plain-text file of any length, and create a list of the unique words contained in it. The list may be saved as a separate file. The author recommends the program for children’s authors and others who need to create word lists from their works. Freeware. Author: Ivory Tower Software. Audience: Beginner-Up; Area: Vocabulary.

and ClozeMaker

http://www.snap.com/download/item/pc/0,22,home-23690,501000.html

ClozeMaker is a program that enables teachers to create cloze ("gap-fill") exercises which students can then do on the computer. A cloze can be created by automatic deletion of every nth word in a text, or by selecting words to be removed. Students can do the exercises as timed tests or without a time limit, and students may choose to see either a list of the missing words, or the complete text of the cloze, if they wish. At the end of each quiz, the student receives a percentage score.

There are many others - one source is CELIA -, the Computerized English Language Instructional Archive. CELIA is an ftp site maintained at Latrobe University in Australia.

ftp://ftp.latrobe.edu.au/pub/CELIA/english/win/00index.win

TheCase.Com

http://www.TheCase.com/kids/

Mysteries to solve, scary stories, magic

tricks, and contests.

New mystery every week—All FREE!

Karin’s ESL PartyLand

Movies on the World Wide Web

Part One: The International Movie Database

http://us.imdb.com/

The IMDB is a great movie resource! You can get information on more than 150,000

movies at this site. You can read reviews, watch film clips, find out about different

directors, comment on new releases, buy movie-related stuff and more. First, go to the

above address. Then, follow the directions below and have fun answering the questions.

 

1. Click on Box Office.  

2. Click on Search

Do a title search for one of my favorite movies: Six Degrees of Separation. What year did this movie come out?

Who are three of the main actors in this movie?

Look for user comments on this movie. In general, what do IMDB users think of this movie?

Click on Soundtrack Listening. (You will be linked to Amazon.com to hear audio clips from this movie.) Once there, find out the theory about the theory called Six Degrees of Separation. (Hint: it’s in a file with that name.) Briefly summarize this theory.

Next, skim through one or two reviews for this movie.

Would you like to see this movie?

Next, do a title search for one of your own favorite movies. Take a few minutes to see what IMDB users and reviewers have to say about your movie. Finally, do a title search for a movie you would like to see. This can be an older movie that has been recommended to you by a friend.

Time for another search. I can’t remember the name of this movie I’d like to rent. I know one of the characters was a woman named Mother Sister. What’s the movie’s title?

Time for another search. When did actress Grace Kelly die? Take a few minutes to search for some of your own favorite actors, actresses, and directors.

3. Click on Browsable Sections (under Extra Content) and surf around the site. Have fun!

 

Part Two: Movie Scripts and Screenplays

Drew’s Scripts-O-Rama: http://www.script-o-rama.com/table.shtml

Movie Script World: http://www.geocities.com/Hollywood/7024/

You can get the scripts or screenplays for a lot of different movies on-line. Use the

addresses above to answer the following questions.

 

Part Three: The Cinema Discussion Board at Karin’s ESL PartyLand

http://www.eslpartyland.com/discussion/movies/

This is an interactive discussion board for English language students and teachers

worldwide. Stop by for a visit. See what people are talking about and post your own

response.

 

Part Four: On-line Tests and Quizzes

http://dir.yahoo.com/Entertainment/Movies_and_Film/Trivia/Quizzes/

These are movie trivia quizzes for native speakers. They’re difficult, but if you know a lot about movies, you might really enjoy taking some of these quizzes.

Topic Ideas for Teachers

http://www.kn.pacbell.com/wired/fil/teacher_ideas.html

Official Guidelines for Choosing a Topic

Idea Pool for Topics

So maybe you’re feeling confused & clueless about what topic to create a cool Web-based learning page on... We can’t get in your head and clear out the weeds, but we can pop in there

and plant some seeds. Below are 50 ideas that might help you hook into an idea you like. Have fun and see if you can’t get in the flow. Skip naysaying and being practical at this point. Live in the land of "What if?" and "Why not?" for a while.

50 random ideas to stimulate the process

 

Use Learning Goals to Choose an Activity Format

So how will you choose which activity format to use? Let’s start with the goal you’re carrying around in your head or heart. Use the chart below to get clearer on your goal and to learn

about the different kinds of Web activities Filamentality can build for you. And you don’t have to choose just one format. Choose one or collect all five: Filamentality gives you that kind of power. Click on any words in the chart to learn about that aspect of the process.

The Biography Maker

http://www.bham.wednet.edu/bio/biomaker.htm

Writing Argumentative Essays

http://www.eslplanet.com/teachertools/argueweb/frntpage.htm

 

 

CNN Interactive Learning Resources

http://www.cnnsf.com/education/education.html A major purpose of this Web site is to provide current news stories to students with reading levels that are not high enough to

read and understand standard newspaper articles. A variety of interactive learning activities help reinforce and provide greater

understanding of what is presented on the screen. Teachers can use the lessons for group activities and students can work at

their own pace for individualized learning.

The Grammar Gorillas

http://www.funbrain.com/grammar/index.html

Do you ever wonder if the students understand when you explain adding an -s to the noun or verb tenses (What’s a verb??) Have them try this cute game first.

Our friends, the Grammar Gorillas, need help identifying parts of speech. If you click on the right word in the sentence, our friends get a banana. And you know, a gorilla with a banana is a gorilla with appeal.

Beginner (nouns and verbs only)

Advanced (all parts of speech)

 

Mind’s Eye Monster Exchange

http://www.win4edu.com/monsterexchange.htm

Take your students on an amazing journey of imagination! In this project, a student in one classroom draws a monster, writes a detailed description of the creation, then e-mails the composition to a student in another classroom. Next, the student who receives the description draws the monster based on the description. Then both the original and the duplicate drawings are posted in the Mind’s Eye Monster Galleries for comparison.

Using Presentation Software to Enhance Language Learning

http://www.aitech.ac.jp/~iteslj/Techniques/Schcolnik-PresSoft.html

A TESOL Journal article on using PowerPoint

(http://www.aitech.ac.jp/~iteslj/)

Two uses of presentation software in our EFL courses: one as a tool for oral reporting and the other as a writing tool. In both cases students use the four language skills actively. They read source materials, discuss their ideas with their peers and teacher, write them and then share their writing with others. In both uses, students function as « doers and creators » and as such are motivated to invest time and energy into their tasks.

Jokes for the English as a Second Language Classroom

http://www.aitech.ac.jp/~ckelly/sub/jokes.html

A Project of The Internet TESL Journal

Teachers often use jokes in the ESL/EFL classroom to teach culture, grammar and vocabulary.

These jokes are submitted by visitors and are automatically added to this page so they may be inappropriate. (We do remove inappropriate ones when we see them.)

Which letters do Tuesday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday have in common?

answer: None! None of them have « c », « o », »m » or « n » in them.

Submitted by Paulo José L. do Amaral

Q: Why couldn’t Mozart find his teacher?

A: Because the teacher was Hayden.

Submitted by Sheila S. and Judy R.

 

Q. What’s a minimum?

A. A very small mother!!

Submitted by Thierry A.

Two old men were sitting next to each other on the London subway (tube). Their hearing wasn’t so good. One says, « Is this Wembley? »

« No, » the other says, « It’s Thursday. »

The first replies, « No thanks, I already had a drink. »

Submitted by Kevin Ryan

This one may be difficult for some ESL students since it requires knowing the words « seagul », « bay » and « bagel » Q: Why do seagulls fly over the sea? A: Because if they flew over the bay, they would be bagels!

Submitted by Corey Palmer, Lemoore, CA

Q: What State in the United States is high in the middle and round at the ends? A: Ohio.

Submitted by Jesus Macario

Q: « What letter of the alphabet has got lots of water? » A: « The C »

Submitted by Susana P. Varona

Q: « What letter of the alphabet is always waiting in order? » A: « The Q. (queue)

Submitted by José Mª Pérez

Q: « There were some twins.One was twenty, the other was twenty 2. One married the other. How can be this ? »

A: « One was twenty, the other twenty too. One was a priest so he married the other »

PS: These sentences must be asked orally.Pronunciation is important. (too = 2)

Submitted by Zekih.

Q: How do you spell mousetrap?

A: C-A-T.

Submitted by Mumblia

Q: How many people are buried in that cemetery?

A: All of them.

I used to be a werewoolf...

But I’m much better noooooooooooow !

Submitted by Eric Vadot

Q. Why was the hearse horse hoarse?

A. Because of the coffin

Submitted by Ciaran P. McCarthy

There is a California dude going through a desert. He’s wearing shorts, sunglasses, a towel and listening to music on his walkman. He’s having a good time. Suddenly he sees a caravan approaching. He stops the Arabs and ask them cheerfully:

« Hey dudes how far is the sea? » They look at each other and say: « Two thousand miles! » And he says: « Wow what a cool beach!!! »

Submitted by Robert Stadnik

There were two spies escaping from the enemy over the Alps into neutral Switzerland during the war. As they began to feel safe, one spy starts to tell the other what he found out in enemy territory. The other tells him to speak quietly.

« Why? », asks his friend a little perplexed. « There’s nobody around for miles. I could scream and not a soul would hear us up here.....! »

« Ah, » replied the other, »haven’t you heard? There are mountain ears? »

(mountaineers)

Submitted by Paddy Greenleaf, teacher IH Viseu, Portugal

Q: What did one light bulb say to another light bulb?

A: You are the light of my life.

This is a humorous « fake » news items which many adult ESL/EFL students may understand.

REDMOND, WA (API) --- MICROSOFT (MSFT) announced today that the official release date for the new operating system « Windows 2000 » will be delayed until the second quarter of 1901.

 

Games and Activities http://www.aitech.ac.jp/~ckelly/sub/games.html

There are lots more at the site!

Word Grab with Songs

Level: Any Level

This is a wonderful activity if you think your class needs waking up a little.

Choose a song that the students have or have not heard before. Choose 10-15 pieces of vocabulary from the song and write them on separate pieces of paper. With lower level groups you may want to pronounce the words with the students first. Stick each word to the board with putty (blue tack). Put the students into 2 teams each one in a line before the board. Play the song.

When the 2 students at the front of their line hear a word in the song that is on the board they must race each other to grab that

word from the board (this can get quite violent!). They then go to the back of the line and it’s up to the next pair. The team with the most words wins.

I don’t usually stop the tape so don’t choose words that come one after the other. If you want to make it more difficult you can put red herrings up. You can usually play the song a couple of times until they get all the words.

Submitted by Nicola Turner

Rate the Apparatus Level: Medium

Activity A

The many household pparatus/machines/gadgets we use at home make life a little bit easier; the micro-wave oven heats things up quickly; the fridge keeps perishable goods fresh; the washing-machine cleans our clothes and saves us time. So, when put to the test, which of these machines/apparatus could we do without-IF WE HAD TO. In other words, which of these machines is the most important, generally speaking. Get your students to make a list of ten common ones, and then get them to list them in order of perceived necessity (for want of a better word). Here is a list I gleaned from my pupils, don’t show it to the pupils at first.

Refrigerator

Washing machine

Shower

Toilet

Tea/Coffee maker

TV

Radio

Telephone

Light bulb

Cooker

Of course, these items must be rated according to perceived necessity, and the rating must be justified. Reasons for a choice must be given. Students will debate the « top » necessity and so on, down to the least important item.

Activity B

Are these things necessary?

The activity A could branch out into further items we use to make life easier and, presumably, make life better. For example:

Perfume

Hair driers

Mirrors

Walkman

Cigarette lighters

Special wine glasses

Mobile telephones

Curtains

Expensive furniture

Sweets and savouries

Etc ...

The idea is not to embark on an ethical crusade, but simple to get people thinking and speaking in English. All of this is, crucially, backed up by realistic reasons for the comments made. Some of the items above are by no means original, but they are everyday things which are part and parcel of our lives.

Can you think of more normal, common-or-garden items which could be dispensed with?

Submitted by Gerard Counihan

 

How Do You Kill Time?

Level: Medium

Here is a simple idea to generate chat among your students. We all know that there are moments during the day when we have nothing to do, no plans. For example, when you are waiting for a teacher, a friend and so on. How do we occupy these periods of time, either mentally or physically? For example:

Activity A

What do you do during the TV advertisements?

Make a list of what the students say

(My students got these)

Talk to my sister

I read something, anything

I get up and do something

I go to the bathroom (!)

I change channels

I look for something to eat or read

I call a friend

I water the plants

I put on some food for the next day

I phone Pizza Hut

I put the children to bed

I brush my teeth

I unload the washing machine/put clothes on line

I rush to do the washing-up

You can also get the students to tick off the ones which they regularly do

and check the most common activities

Activity B

Ways to pass the time/occupy your mind/self when you are:

In a bus queue

Waiting at a supermarket check-out

In a doctor’s waiting-room

Waiting for your boy/girlfriend on a cold day-outdoors

In a cinema/theatre, waiting for the film/play

In a traffic jam

In an airport/train station

In a lift/elevator

Getting your hair done/cut

Etc ...

Submitted by Gerard Counihan

Tell me about myself

Level: Any Level

This game works well with students at pre-intermediate level or above and can be adapted accordingly. It is an original way of

introducing yourself (as a teacher) to a class for the first time, but could also be used later on.

Prepare in advance, on an overhead transparency or white-board, a mind map of yourself. Instead of using sentences to

describe your life, use single words, numbers, dates, symbols and illustrations where possible.

For example I include information about my life in England, names of siblings, date of birth, name of hometown etc. (My hometown is Stoke-on-Trent which I then illustrate with a cup and saucer - the Potteries, and a football - Stoke City FC. It keeps them guessing.)

I include information about my husband (name and illustration of job) children (names, ages, birthdays). You can add your shoe size, height, illustrations of your hobbies etc. I draw a needle and thread - sewing, a pair of skis - I enjoy skiing, and a pencil - drawing.

Any kind of information can be included. Use your imagination! I live in Sweden and draw a picture of a snowman with a cross through it to illustrate that I don´t like the winter!

Get your students to tell you what the information means. For example.

July - is that when your birthday is?

Does the cup and saucer mean you drink tea?

Try and get a good mix of obvious and less obvious information. For example, when I drew a fish (to illustrate that I kept tropical fish) it provoked questions like: Do you eat a lot of fish?

Do you enjoy fishing?

Is your star sign pisces?

Give them a clue if they´re having problems guessing.

This game has worked wonderfully for me in many classes of varying levels. To follow up, get you students to take a few minutes to prepare something similar individually, and then work in pairs guessing what the information means about their partner.

Submitted by Dawn Garnheim, Sweden

 

 

People Who ...

Level: Any Level

An activity whose aim is to complete sentences and also take advantage of the contributions in order to generate debate and interaction.

How: Just hand out the following sheet with the heading

PEOPLE WHO ...

and tell the students they have to complete the sentences with realism-not just adding on a grammatically correct ending.

PARK THEIR CARS ON THE FOOTPATH ...

WHO DON’T PAY TAX ...

WHO THROW LITTER ON THE GROUND ...

WHO GIVE MONEY TO CHARITIES ...

EAT CRISPS AT THE CINEMA ARE ...

WHO DRINK AND DRIVE ...

WHO TRAVEL A LOT ...

WHO SAVE LOTS OF MONEY ...

WATCH TV ALL DAY ...

GO TO THE OPERA ...

EAT FROG’S LEGS ...

CLIMB EVEREST ...

HUNT WHALES ...

EAT TOO MUCH ...

DRIVE TOO FAST ...

JUMP QUEUES ...

WHISTLE AT GIRLS ...

SMOKE IN PUBLIC SPACES ...

EARN A LOT OF MONEY ...

THROW THEIR OLD COOKER INTO A FIELD ...

SNORE ...

Etc .......... (Add more!)

NB: The idea is to get personal, individual endings. For example, for

« People who eat crisps in the cinema ... »,

I got: annoy me

should eat them before the show

make a lot of noise

have a right to do so (!)

 

 

As you can see, everybody has a different answer-and opinion. The latter is what generates talk.

So you kill two birds with one stone: You practise grammar and you get students talking.

Submitted by Gerard Counihan

FLY SWAT!

Level: Any Level

Divide your class into 2 groups.

Choose 2 ss. and ask them to go to the back part of the classroom and turn back.

Display on the blackboard 20 vocabulary words and over 10 of them paste « flies » made of cardboard paper with a piece of velcro on them.

Give both ss. a fly swatter with the other side of velcro on them.

The objective on the game is that you will say a word and ss. will turn back and run to « fly swat » the word that has the bug over it. The ss. who « kills » the fly has to spell the word and then he will score a point for his team.

With the fly swatter and the velcro flies, you can invent many different games. Try it!!!

I´ve worked with 4, 5 and 6 graders and they love this game.

Submitted by Guillermo Flores Grajales

 

Web News Articles (sec 5)

I would like to inform you and other teachers of a recent construction of a site which you can find at:

http://csrs.cyberscol.qc.ca/bouscol/anglais/news/home.htm

This is a lesson that I designed on Web News Articles. Enjoy it with your students.

Jean HUOT, ESL teacher, at l’école secondaire du Phare, à Sherbrooke

Ps. This is a very pedagogically-designed site with objectives, student and teacher guides, etc. - impressive! Rm

 

The Holiday Zone

http://www.geocities.com/Athens/Troy/9087/egames.html

The Egg Hunt

Cut six eggs each out of four different colors of paper. Hide the eggs throughout the school. Divide students into four teams. Give each team a written clue or directions to help them find their first egg. On the back of the first egg, write a clue or directions to the second, and so forth. The winning team is the first to find all six eggs and return to the classroom.

Mystery Egg

If possible, obtain plastic Easter eggs. (Even half a dozen is sufficient.) Fill each egg with a different substance—sand, coins, paper, candy, rocks, grass, etc. Students must try to guess what is inside each egg by asking questions. (i.e. Is it soft or hard? Does it taste good? Is it something usually found outside? and so forth.) A variation is to tell one student what is inside the egg. That student must then answer questions.

Scrambled Eggs

Cut egg halves out of paper. On the back of each half, write a word or draw a picture. On the next half, write or draw its opposite (i.e. hot/cold, big/little, over/under, etc.). Label the first half A and the second B. When students arrive, give each one two mismatched egg halves (one A half and one B half). Students must find their other half by asking other students questions in English. When the students make a match, the student holding the A half keeps the match. The winner is the first student to give away his B half and find the match for his A half. (This activity may also be done with rhyming words, numbers/number words, pictures/vocabulary words, etc.)

The Bunny Pokey (to the tune of The Hokey Pokey)

You put your right paws [right hand and foot] in, you take your right paws out.

You put your right paws in, and you shake them all about.

You do the Bunny Pokey, and you hop all around.

That’s what it’s all about!

You put your left paws in....

Your put your pink nose in...

You put your floppy ears in...

You put your cotton tail in...

You put the whole bunny in...

Why Do We Give Easter Eggs?

The Easter egg is venerable indeed. While the gaily colored cardboard ones and rich chocolate ones that we enjoy are quite recent in origin, the real egg, decorated with colors or gilt, has been acknowledged as a symbol of continuing life and resurrection since pre-Christian spring celebrations. Given as gifts by the ancient Greeks, Persians, and Chinese at their spring festivals, the egg also appears in pagan mythology, where we read of the Sun-Bird being hatched from the World Egg. In some pagan customs, the Heaven and Earth were thought to have been formed from two halves of an egg. As the egg was an obvious symbol to early Christians of Jesus’ Resurrection, it was felt to be a most appropriate and holy part of the Eastertide celebration. Even as early as the Middle Ages, eggs were colored to be given as gifts at Easter; Edward I’s accounts for 1290 include the expense of purchasing hundreds of eggs to be distributed to his household. in the 17th century, pope Paul V blessed the humble egg in a prayer to be used in England, Scotland, and Ireland: « Bless, O Lord, we beseech Thee, this Thy creature of eggs, that it may become a wholesome sustenance to Thy faithful servants, eating in thankfulness to Thee, on account of the Resurrection of Our Lord. » Forbidden during the solemn fast of Lent, eggs were reintroduced on Easter Sunday, both as part of the feasting and as gifts for family, friends, and servants.

Anonymous (1913)

 

Guidelines for choosing textbooks

There are many books on ESL methodology that have evaluation guidelines for choosing textbooks although some of them can get pretty complex. In workshops I do I often get asked this question and have come up with the following guidelines:

Contract and a handThese are some of the questions I ask myself when decding on a textbook.

Terry Pruett-Said

ESL instructor

NE Iowa USA

pruetlst@luther.edu

Ye Olde English Sayings

http://www.rootsweb.com/~genepool/sayings.htm

As there seems to be some discrepancy between the origins of theses words, have students « invent » their own origin of sayings such as « It »s raining cats and dogs » That should get their imagination going and add fun to vocabulary learning.

THE CLINK

The name of a prison which was on Clink Street in the Southwark area of London.

BLACK MARKET

In medieval England there were nomadic mercenaires who wandered the country side and would sell their services to the highest bidder. These were hardened fighters who lived solitary lives in the wilderness. They did not have the luxury of servants to polish their armor and it would oxidize to a blackish hue, and they came to be known as black knights. At local town festivals they would have exhibition jousting matches in which the winner of the fight would win the loser’s weapons and armor. The local gentry, softened by the good life, would lose to these black knights. The nomadic knights didn’t have much use for an extra set of armor and would sell it back to them immediately after the fight. The losing nobility would be forced to buy back their armor and this after market came to be known as the "Black Market" (submitted by Gonzalo).

Judith interjects: Isn’t it kind of strange that if "black market" is a medieval term, the Oxford English Dictionary doesn’t show it as having been first used until 1931 in "The Economist." Come on, this is garbage. Fun garbage maybe, but garbage.

SON OF A GUN

After sailors had crossed the Atlantic to the West Indies, they would take the native women on board the ship and have their way with them in between the cannons. Some of the women the sailors left behind would have boys, who were called sons between the guns.

PATENT LEATHER

After the Patten shoe which the young women wore in the buttery. When the cream spilled on their shoes, the fat would tend to make the leather shiny.

DONE TO A TURN

Meat was roasted until cooked on an upright spit which had to be turned by hand.

BEAT AROUND THE BUSH

Game birds were scared out of their hiding places under bushes and then killed.

CUT THROUGH THE RED TAPE

Solicitors kept their clients papers in a file folder tied with red ribbon to prevent the papers from falling out. Of course, when they wanted to get at the papers, they would have to cut through the red tape.

MINDING YOUR Ps & Qs

Ale was served at local taverns out of a "tankard"... you were charged by the angle of your elbow ...

half-way up... you drank a pint, all the way up...you drank a quart. Since the Quart cost so much more than the Pint, you were warned to "Mind your Ps & Qs"

 

Listening games

http://members.aol.com/TFCIntl/listening.html

In the City

Skill: Following oral directions to arrive at a specific locations

Materials: two identical city street maps listing sites such as school, post office, department stores, hospital, churches, police

stations, etc. (may be teacher created); two Matchbox cars

Number of Players: 4-12

Game: Divide students into two groups. Student from each group places his car on map at a prescribed location. Teacher gives directions to destination. (Example: "Turn right on to Main Street. Go four blocks. Turn left at the church. Turn right onto the next street. Cross the railroad tracks. Take the next left. The supermarket is two blocks down on your right.") Other students should monitor to see that driver follows prescribed route. (In one class, I gave each student 10 tokens at the beginning of the game. Observing students were highway patrolmen who could fine driver one token for directional violations. Students got to exchange tokens for M&M’s at the end of the game.)

Treasure Hunt

Skill: Following oral directions

Number of Players: 2-12

Materials: Small prizes as "treasure"

Game: Design several routes to one common destination. Direct students individually or in pairs to destination. Upon successful completion of the journey, they arrive at a common prize (a basket of fruit or cans of soda are ideal).

Variation One: If it can be arranged for each student to have a Walkman, teacher may record various sets of directions for students to listen to and follow. In one high school class, I recorded a different set of instructions for each student to take a ten minute walk to a nearby department store. Upon successful completion of the journey, students found themselves standing in front of the ice cream counter.

Variation Two: Particularly in younger classes (pre-school and kindergarten) the teacher cannot divide the students or allow any of them out of sight. I arranged a safe route to a nearby playground, and lined students up for an ESL adaptation of "Follow the Leader." Giving directions, I rotated each student into the leader position. It was a roundabout journey by the time fourteen students had practiced left, right, stop, and go, but the kids loved it and benefited from it.

Let’s Go to the Supermarket!

Skill: Recognizing common foods, beverages, and cleaning products

Number of Players: 8-16

Materials: One set (30-40 cards) of supermarket goods cards for each group of four students. Suggestion: Collect the supermarket sale flyers that litter the floors of many apartment buildings. Better yet, have a friend mail four identical sales papers from the states (~$1.80). Cut out four identical sets of pictures—fruits, vegetables, meats, snack foods, rice and bread, beverages, cleaning and paper products. Glue pictures to index cards or heavy paper. Laminate if possible for prolonged life.

Game: Divide students into teams of 3-4. Give each team one deck of cards. One shopper from each team takes possession of cards. Read off a list of grocery items. For example, « I need bread, butter, milk, bananas, carrots, sugar, and dish detergent. » The first student to fill the order correctly earns a point for his team.

SPEAKING GAMES

http://members.aol.com/TFCIntl/speaking.html

Taxi Driver

Skill: Giving and following oral directions to a prescribed location

Number of Players: 4-12

Materials Needed: City map with street names and major landmarks clearly identified (may be teacher-created) for each pair of students; cards listing locations marked on map; small toy vehicles.

Note: I created several large practice maps by simply drawing streets on large pieces of heavy paper and laminating these. I then created "buildings" (elementary school, supermarket, mall, police station, fire station, hospital, doctor’s office, high school, church, theater, library, book store, apartment buildings, and houses) by cutting out squares of paper and writing the name of the location and a small-related symbol (i.e. fire truck on fire station card, picture books on elementary school card, teenagers on high school card—whatever related symbol I could find) on each card and laminating these as well. This allowed increased practice, as buildings could be moved to different locations each time students played. Another teacher collected a variety of city maps (detailed downtown areas) by writing to the Chamber of Commerce in several major U.S. cities and requesting such information. Students received a different map each time they played.

Game: Divide students into pairs. Give each pair a map, a car, and a stack of location cards. Students will alternate between customer and taxi driver role. The customer draws one card to determine his current location. He shares this information with the taxi drive. The customer then draws a second card to determine his destination. He may not tell the taxi driver the destination. Instead, he must orally direct the taxi driver. The taxi driver should then follow directions exactly as they are given. To add interest, you may give each student ten tokens. Any errors in the customer’s directions cost him a token. Conversely, the driver loses a token whenever he fails to follow instructions properly.

Doctor, Doctor!

Skill: Utilizing basic health-related vocabulary to obtain needed medical attention

Number of Players: 6-15

Variation One: The object of this game is to diagnose a medical condition correctly. Ask one student to step out of the room. This student becomes the doctor. Assign a particular medical condition to the remaining students (i.e. cold, broken arm, stomach ache, food poisoning, heart attack). Allow the doctor to return. He must determine the problem by asking students yes/no questions. ("Do you have a fever?" "Does your head hurt?" "Did you have an accident?" and so forth.) Play until each student has had at least one opportunity to be the doctor.

Variation Two: The object of this game is to describe a medical condition accurately. Ask one student to step out of the room. This student becomes the doctor. Assign a particular medical condition to the remaining students (i.e. cold, broken arm, stomach ache, food poisoning, heart attack). Allow the doctor to return. Each student must give a clue to the malady until the doctor has correctly diagnosed the problem. ("I am a child." "I fell from a tree." "I landed on my right arm." "My right arm is very sore." "I cannot move my right arm.")

Twins Skill: Identifying items of apparel and describing them in detail.

Number of Players: 4-12

Materials Needed: several sheets of paper and colored pencils, markers, or crayons for each group

Setting: Two friends are talking on the phone. They want to dress alike for school the next day. One student must describe what he or she is wearing so that the other can follow suite.

Game: Divide players into pairs. Give each student paper and colored pencils. Instruct students to hold paper in such a way that partner cannot see what is being drawn. (If tables are used in classroom, partners should sit across from each other. Student one begins to describe what he or she is wearing while sketching what he or she is visualizing. ("I’m wearing light blue jeans." "I’m wearing yellow and white striped T-shirt." "The stripes are diagonal." "I’m wearing navy socks." "There are small yellow flowers on my socks." "The flowers have tiny orange centers." "I’m wearing white sneakers with gray laces and gray soles. I’m wearing a black watch with a neon green face.") Student two sketches each item as described by student one. At the end of a set time period (five-seven minutes), all drawing must stop. The pair of students with the most similar, detailed drawings win the Twins’ Award. Reverse student roles, and play again.

More games

http://members.aol.com/TFCIntl/misc.html

Letter Scrapbook

Make up a scrapbook with each page dedicated to one letter. On the page collect and paste pictures of things that begin with that letter. Select pictures that only begin with the simple sound and not the compound sound, i.e. sail and not shell.

Do What They Say

Each student whispers a simple thing for the next student to do. For example: Smile, Sit down, Stand up, touch you head, etc. The student must then act out the directions.

Cars

Both you and a student have a car. As you roll the car along, make up a commentary of where you are and how the car is going. Example: The car going fast. The car is under the table. The car is beside Tom. The student then repeats the direction to you. Take turns with the child about doing the ‘play by play’.

You could also make up an imaginary commentary of where you are going in the car, what you are seeing, how everything is. This can be a great way to create interesting stories out of separate sentences

 

Counting

Try to count everything as you touch it. Count the buttons on a shirt as you touch them. Count paper clips as you put them into a box. Everytime you see a number have the student say the word. If there are a number of items of anything, count them as the student touches them. Ask the student how many toes they have. The student then counts them.

Playing store

Collect a number of items which can be put up for sale. Place a price tag of a certain number. If you use buttons for currency then put a 2 for a pencil. A crayon is worth 1 and a piece of paper is worth 3. Give the students a certain number of buttons to purchase the items. Have them ask the ‘clerk’ how much each item is. "How much is this pencil?" "How much is the paper?" You can even mix currency by adding bottle caps or something else and assigning it a value so as to force the making of change. Here the emphasis is on speaking English and not arithmetic.

What’s This?

A student will touch or point to an object and ask "What’s this?" or "What’s that?". The student next to them must answer by making a complete sentence like: "It’s a clock." or "It’s your watch." If the student is wrong than a point is taken away. If the student is right than their team wins a point.

An advanced form would be for the student who asks the question to add: "Is it a _____?" with the blank being something either correct or incorrect. Then the other team must decide which it is.

Same or Different

The teacher says two sentences and a student must determine whether they were the same or different. Make sure you say the sentences in as exactly the same way as possible.

"You are big."

"You are big."

The same.

"I am tall."

"I am small."

Different.

Use not just sentences but minimal pairs as well. Leaf - leave. She - she - he. etc. Why not do the same only substitute phonetic sounds for words.

Rhyme Time

Here’s one that will help in teaching words that rhyme. As you say words such as rule and mule, slap your hands against your thighs and then clap them together. This creates a one-two beat. As in the example: ru-le, mu-le, etc. . This same beat can be used with three syllable words where you stomp your feet, slap your thighs and clap your hands. This adds lots of fun to boring recitation of strange words. The only problems may be that the kids get too rowdy on you. (See also Rhythm Sockball).

The EFL Playhouse

http://members.tripod.com/~ESL4Kids/index.html

CRAFTS

Edible Shapes

Language Skill Emphasized:

shapes; « Make a ________. »

Other Language Reviewed:

units of measure; mixing directions; ingredients

Family Tree

Language Skill Emphasized:

family relationships

Other Language Reviewed:

« Paste »

« Show me »

« Who is he/she? »

« He/She"s my ________. »

« What"s his/her name? »

« His/Her name is _______. »

 

My Favorite Mobile

Language Skill Emphasized:

What is your favorite _______? / My favorite ________ is ________.

Other Language Reviewed:

colors, sports, toys, foods

Nature Hunt

Language Skill Emphasized:

colors; objects in nature (tree, leaf, grass, flower, sky, water, bird, bug, etc.)

Other Language Reviewed:

« Draw »

« Show me »

What is it? »

« It"s a ________. »

« Did you see _____? »

« Yes, I did. » / « No, I didn"t. »

Chants

http://members.tripod.com/~ESL4Kids/chants.html

Chants can be a fun way for students to acquire new vocabulary and use this language in proper syntax. Even the youngest learners will enjoy the repetition and rhythm of these language activities.

Alphabet Chants

initial consonant sounds; short vowel sounds

A Walk In The Jungle

names of animals; descriptions

Bear Hunt

basic directional terms

Clothes Chant

basic articles of clothing; color/clothing

combination; questions and answer

Five Little Firefighters

occupation and related terminology

If I Were...

occupations and related activities

"I Like to Eat"

expressing likes and dislikes; foods

Mix a Pancake

simple actions; describing a process

Open Them, Shut Them

open/shut/clap/fold; a good activity to

prepare for a quiet story, teaching, or snack

time

Rain, Rain, Go Away!

weather concepts

Shake My Wiggles Out basic actions; good activity to get rid of some extra energy!

Tall and Small

opposites; physical descriptions

Tongue Twisters :

for the ESL/EFL Classroom

http://members.aol.com/TFCIntl/tongue.html

Busy buzzing bumble bees.

Captain Kangaroo’s carefully crunching crunchy candy corn.

Chris crashes crimson cars quickly.

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck

if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

He would chuck, he would, as much as he could,

and chuck as much wood as a woodchuck would

if a woodchuck could chuck wood.

Sally sells sea shells by the sea shore. But if Sally sells sea shells by the sea shore then where are the

sea shells Sally sells?

The sixth sheik’s sixth sheep is sick.

 

Doing Less While Students Do More
(TESOL ‘96, presentation #3976)
 

The "doing less" idea in a nutshell: For anything you do as part of your teaching, ask yourself if the students could do it instead. If they did, how would it benefit their learning? The "doing less" principle can help teachers discover ways to renew their teaching, reduce their workload, and enhance students’ learning.

A sampling of "doing less" ideas:

Class activities
Instead of answering the teacher’s questions about a text (oral or written), students write their own questions in groups. They can be encouraged to ask a variety of questions: detail questions, main idea questions, questions about structure, questions that call for evaluation, questions they’d like to ask the author. Later they discuss their questions with students in other groups.
Students take dictation from each other; one way to do this is to have all the students at the board Student X dictates to everyone and can immediately see the results.
In reviewing for a quiz, students predict the quiz content and write quiz questions that later appear on the actual quiz.
Students teach peer grammar lessons based on one of their own recurrent errors (after they’ve learned how to correct it). In one simple version of this activity, the student puts a flawed sentence on the board and leads a class discussion of it.
At the end of the term, students prepare a comprehensive review by dividing up the course content, assigning groups to handle a topic, and conducting peer-taught reviews.

Materials and curriculum
Students find things they’d like to read in newspapers, magazines, or other sources. One week they read their self-assigned articles and write brief commentaries about them. The next week the commentaries are circulated and students make new individual selections based on their peer’s recommendations. Or they choose one article to focus on as a class in the coming week.
Students choose problems from their own writing to become the focus of lessons. A student might produce a handout showing a sentence or paragraph she’s struggling with; the teacher and the class offer feedback.
Instead of the teacher creating a handout of problem sentences, each student writes one problem sentence on a sheet; photocopied, it becomes a handout for the next day’s class.
Instead of using a handout, the teacher says, "Write this down," and the students create their own record of the lesson. If the teacher plans carefully, the students can dictate parts of the material.
Students bring in sentences they’ve found for analysis in class. Before class they write the sentences on the board; in class they introduce it and tell why it interested them.

Record keeping / business
Students keep a class log of what they have studied, in a three-ring binder that is passed from student to student, depending on whose day it is. If you have your own classroom, the log pages can be put on the walls.
Students keep error logs as a record of their problems and how to solve them (error in context on the left side of the sheet, revision on the right).
A student writes the day’s plan on the blackboard and opens the class by greeting everyone, calling attention to the plan, and reading through it.

Students give directions for an activity.
Students give closure to an activity or to the day’s lesson by asking and answering, "What have we learned today?" Or students provide closure by writing a sentence or two about what they learned.
In an all-class discussion, when a student finishes talking, she "passes the torch" to another student; the teacher doesn’t intervene.

Responding to student work
Before handing in an essay, the student writes a "cover sheet" to ease the teacher’s reading task; in one version this includes the title, the topic, the main idea, a sketch of the overall structure, and requests to channel feedback ("Do I need more details in paragraph 2?"). The student may also write marginal comments to call the teacher’s attention to problems.
Students give peer feedback on essays in writing; if students are taught to do this effectively, the teacher can often respond "I agree with X" (in addition to offering feedback on things the peer readers overlooked).
On assignments, students occasionally trade papers (or tapes) and offer each other feedback.

More jokes

http://www.geocities.com/Athens/Oracle/3537/lr/jokes.htm

 

1.Waiter, waiter, will the pancakes be long?

No, sir, round.

 

2.Waiter, waiter, what’s the fly doing in my soup?

I guess, the breaststroke, sir.

 

3.Waiter, waiter, what soup is this?

It’s bean soup, sir.

I don’t care what it was. I want to know what it is now.

 

4. Doctor, doctor, will you help me out?

Certainly, which way did you come in?

5. Teacher: I wish you’d pay a little attention.

Pupil: I am paying as little as I can.

6. Teacher: You should have been here at 9 o’clock.

Small boy: Why, what happened?

7. What sort of robbery is the easiest?

A safe robbery.

8. Which is the fastest: heat or cold?

Heat, because you can catch cold.

9. Which driver never commits a traffic offense?

A screwdriver.

10. What did the barman say when the ghost asked for a drink?

Sorry, we don’t serve spirits.

11. A barrel of beer fell on a man. Why wasn’t he hurt?

It was light ale.

12. What do you call a bull asleep on the ground?

A bulldozer.

Contact:

Ron Mastine
Le Tournesol, Windsor
(819) 845-7111
fax (819) 845- 5740
rmastine@sunqbc.risq.qc.ca